Looking for some really freaky lesbian quotes about love, sex, and life? We have rounded up the best collection of freaky lesbian quotes, sayings, captions, status messages that will light up your day.

Lesbians have a very different view of love, sex, and relationships than the rest of the world. They often have a more liberated view of sex, love, and relationships.

Though sometimes, they are misunderstood by the rest of the world because of their different view on relationships and sex. These unique and rare quotes about lesbians will surely give you a new insight into their world.

Freaky Lesbian Quotes

1. “I know what you’re thinking, ‘He’s a man and she’s a woman.’ But we’ve been together for a long time, and I think it’s about time we just cut the bullshit.” –Dr. Seuss

2. “I’m a lover, not a fighter. I’m gentle, tender and very patient. I’m the kind of lover who never hurts you. I’m the kind of lover who would die for you.” — Judy Garland

3. “We are born alone, but we live in society. We must therefore find means to satisfy the need to love which is as old as humanity.” —Sigmund Freud

4. “When a man marries, he gives away half his brain.” — Oscar Wilde

5. “Love is an act of will. It requires that you do something against your nature.” —Cher

6. “I’d rather be a bad lover than a good husband.” —Unknown

7. “I love you because you are an idiot.” —Pablo Neruda

8. “The best sex I ever had was with a woman I loved and she loved me back. It was so great, it made me want to get married.” —Groucho Marx

9. “Sex is not just for procreation. Sex is for fun.” —Marilyn Monroe

10. “All women should be like my mother. They should be warm, loving, kind, understanding and forgiving. And they should be able to sew a button on a shirt.” —Anonymous

11. “I’m crazy about you. It’s very simple. You’re the only girl in the world.” —Jackie Mason

12. “I love you because you are a sweet, beautiful disaster.” —Lily Allen

13. “If you are lucky enough to find that one person who will love you even though you are imperfect, you have truly been blessed. For that is how much I love you.” —Unknown

14. “I love you because you’re my sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know dear how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away.” —Unknown

15. “Love is like a butterfly you can catch it with your hands, but it’s much more fun to let it flutter inside your heart.” —Unknown

16. “Love is like a game of chess. It’s two people moving around on the board, thinking ahead, planning their moves. Then they do something unexpected and it’s all over.” —Unknown

17. “You know what I love about you? You’re the only one who calls me by my first name.” —Anonymous

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18. “I am not afraid of death, for I shall be dead soon enough. I had rather die in the trying than live in the safety.” —John Keats

19. “There’s a reason they call it a lesbian bar.” —Tina Fey

20. “I know what you’re thinking. I’m not a lesbian. I’m just a bisexual woman who loves women.” —Tina Fey

21. “The lesbian thing isn’t a fad. It’s a lifestyle.” —Tina Fey

22. “It is a lesbian bar. I am a lesbian.” —Molly Shannon

23. “If you think you can be a lesbian and still be cool, you don’t know the first thing about being a lesbian.” —Rosie O’Donnell

24. “I’m a lesbian. And if you can’t tell by the way I walk, then you’re blind as a bat.” —Samantha Bee

25. “I don’t like to call myself a lesbian, but I do like to call myself a dyke.” —Samantha Bee

26. “I don’t mind being called a dyke. I just don’t want to be called a dyke.” —Samantha Bee

27. “I’m not really a dyke. I just like to play with myself.” —Samantha Bee

28. “I am a lesbian. It’s not a fad. It’s a lifestyle.” —Rosie O’Donnell

29. “I’m a lesbian. And if you can’t tell by the way I walk, then you’re blind as a bat.” —Rosie O’Donnell

30. “All lesbians are crazy.” — Anne Heche

31. “Lesbians don’t have enough to worry about without men trying to pick them up.” — Phyllis Diller

32. “I think all women secretly want to be a lesbian.” — Roseanne Barr

33. “The trouble with most women is that they don’t know what they want. They just know what they don’t want.” — Marilyn Monroe

34. “I’m not a lesbian. I’m just not married.” — Bernadette Peters

35. “Most straight women would rather have a vagina dentata than a vagina dentata.” — Cheri Nixon

36. “Lesbians never lie about who they’re sleeping with. They just omit the details.” — Nancy Kwan

37. “I think all lesbians are actually bisexual because they haven’t found a woman yet who satisfies them.” — Dyan Cannon

38. “All lesbians are really just gay men trapped in women’s bodies.” — Rosie O’Donnell

39. “I think all lesbians secretly want to be straight.” — Bernadette Peters

40. “Most straight men would rather have a vagina dentata than a vagina dentata.” — Cheri Nixon

41. “Most straight men secretly want to be lesbian.” — Bernadette Peters

42. “The only difference is that most lesbians don’t tell anyone.” — Nancy Kwan

43. “Lesbians are people who have been cheated of the experience of having a relationship with a man.” — Phyllis Diller

44. “You know, when God made the clitoris, he was being ironic.” — Phyllis Nagy

45. “The truth is, many women are more attracted to other women.” — Stephen Geller

46. “All women secretly want to be a lesbian.” — Bernadette Peters

47. “I think all people when they are really honest with themselves, want to be lesbian or gay.” — Anonymous

48. “I think all people when they are really honest with themselves, want to be straight.” — Anonymous

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49. “Most people are lesbians trapped in a man’s body. Or vice versa.” — Cheri Nixon

50. “If God had intended us to sleep with women, he would have given us breasts.” — Bernadette Peters

Freaky Lesbian Quotes51. “There’s no reason why a girl shouldn’t be a lesbian if she wants to.” –Eve Ensler

52. “A woman who loves women and is not a lesbian is like a fish who loves water and is not wet.” –Germaine Greer

53. “I think I can live without sex, but I can’t live without love.” –Gilda Radner

54. “I love my girlfriend more than I love myself, and I’m a lesbian.” –Shannon Tweed

55. “I’m a lesbian. That’s why I’m always getting hit on by men.” –Sophia Loren

56. “I don’t care what you do as long as you’re happy.” –Lily Tomlin

57. “I’ve never had a lesbian experience, but I’ve had a few gay ones.” –Elton John

58. “I am a lesbian. I love women. But I also love men. I just haven’t found the right man yet.” –Audrey Hepburn

59. “I love women. I love them too much to have sex with them.” –Rita Mae Brown

60. “I was once a lesbian, and I can tell you, it is not a pretty picture.” –Gilda Radner

61. “Lesbians are like black people. We don’t want to be identified with, so we wear white.” –Lily Tomlin

62. “My wife and I have been together for twenty-two years. She’s my best friend and she’s my lover.” –Elton John

63. “If you’re a lesbian, you’ve got to admit that there’s nothing better than getting a massage from a beautiful woman.” –Martha Stewart

64. “You know, I’ve often wondered about lesbians. Is it true they only date other lesbians?” — Jay Leno

65. “Lesbians are just men who haven’t found each other yet.” — Dolly Parton

66. “A lesbian is someone who prefers other women.” — Judy Garland

67. “Women don’t like lesbians. They just like a good woman.” — Roseanne Barr

68. “Lesbians never forget they were once straight. They just pretend to be gay until they find a real one.” — Roseanne Barr

69. “If you want to attract a lesbian, don’t talk about what you will do for her; talk about what you will do for her friends.” — Ann Landers

70. “Lesbians hate assholes. That’s why they date me.” — Roseanne Barr

71. “Lesbians never lie about what they want. They’re always very honest about it. They’ll tell you exactly what they want. And believe me, most of them want the same thing I do.” — Jerry Seinfeld

72. “I think all lesbians secretly want to be straight. It’s just that no one ever tells them how to become straight.” — Roseanne Barr

73. “A lesbian is someone who has been rejected by God and wishes she was still a virgin.” — Roseanne Barr

74. “God made some guys really big and some guys really small. And then he made all the lesbians really, really large.” — Roseanne Barr

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75. “You know, every time I go into a gay bar, I say to myself, ‘God, I hope there’s a pretty girl in here.’ Because if there is, I’m going to pick her up and take her home with me and love her and cherish her for the rest of my life.” — Bette Midler

76. “Women don’t like lesbians. They just like a good woman.” — Judy Garland

77. “Women like sex too, even with other women.” — Roseanne Barr

78. “You know, every time I go into a gay bar, I say to myself, ‘God, I hope there’s a pretty girl in here.’ Because if there is, I’m going to pick

79. “I’m a lesbian, and I’m proud of it.” –Rita Mae Brown

80. “If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with.” –Audrey Hepburn

81. “I would rather be a lesbian than go to a party where there are men present.” –Martha Grimes

82. “If you’re a lesbian, don’t worry, you’re not alone.” –Gilda Radner

83. “Lesbians are just women who have sex with other women.” –Katherine Dunn

84. “There’s nothing like a good lesbian relationship to bring out the best in a woman.” –Penny Marshall

85. “It’s nice to know that there are people out there who think that being a lesbian is as cool as it is being a pirate or a vampire.” –Dawn French

86. “Being a lesbian is like having a beautiful friend. You can’t help but want to look at her.” —Sophie Tucker

87. “Lesbianism is the only true freedom, for it is only when we are free of men that we can be truly free.” —Adrienne Rich

88. “I wish I were a lesbian, because then I could be one of those girls who has sex with women.” —Madonna

89. “I’m a lesbian. It’s like being a vegetarian. If you don’t try it once in your life, you may never know what you’re missing.” —Lily Tomlin

90. “I think of lesbians as being like the Beatles. You know, the Beatles and the Beach Boys, and the Rolling Stones.” —Joan Rivers

91. “I am a lesbian. I love women.” —Catherine Zeta-Jones

92. “My mother was a lesbian, my father was a gay man, so I’m a bisexual.” —Ellen DeGeneres

93. “Lesbianism is like jazz. You don’t really know what you’re going to get until you hear it.” —Dawn French

94. “I’m a lesbian, and I love men!” –Janet Jackson

95. “I have a lot of friends who are lesbians.” —Julia Roberts

96. “Lesbians are the new black.” —Samantha Ronson

97. “Lesbians are like a new kind of fashion. You can’t go out without them.” —Madonna

98. “I am a lesbian. It is a fact that I have no interest in men.” —Katharine Hepburn

99. “I have a girlfriend, and she has a boyfriend, and I think that’s pretty normal.” — Lorne Michaels

100. “I don’t know what it is, but there’s something about lesbians that just makes me feel good inside.” — David Spade


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